I started to entitle this piece "Improvisation Ain't for Sissies". Somehow it seemed accurate but it sounded tasteless. So, beginning with improvisation and title change...
When you improvise in music or life you're required to be bold and you're bound to be bruised. I believe improvisation comes from within one's self.
Yes, improvisation can be practiced. There are those who believe that certain conventions apply to improvisation. There are even classes in improvisation with formulas and frameworks to which one must apply one's self.
I'm not one of the folks who enjoys that style of improvisation. For me, improvisation is a difficult mistress; a muse from which there is little comfort offered and less invitation extended. To improvise is to set sail into unknown waters with the smattering of skill and expertise this short life can provide. Improvisation is for the bold - those who are willing to try new things and who are willing to endure the shots that are bound to follow.
When I was in college, my art professor had very little good to say about my work in ceramics. His usual comment was that he'd "seen it before". Interestingly, I'd not "seen it before"! I'd never worked with clay or studied the topic. Still, his evaluation was that my lack of experience/originality inherently devalued my work. I had a choice... I could refrain from trying anything until I'd seen everything my art professor had seen. Or, I could take a leap and follow my own vision - even if it wasn't up to the standards my art professor maintained. In the end, I chose my vision over paralysis!! I've been doing that ever since! I got a B in the course - but I learned a valuable lesson in how to expand my own improvisational sensibilties!
The bruises that come from improvisation usually come from people who think they know what your improvisation should be. I've come to learn, painfully, that if I depend on the evaluations of others, I'll simply never improvise. I'll never soar into the heart of the music or embrace the complexity of life. I'll be grounded. My belief in myself will be shelved along with my desire to expand and breathe the free air of the "as yet" unexperienced. Not surprisingly, I'd rather be bruised, battered, tattered; even sometimes forlorn and lonely! But, I will not be grounded!
Every time I put my hands on a piano keyboard or lift a guitar into my arms or embrace the foolishness of preaching, I take a risk. Will I play or preach the tried and true only to be bound by the stifling judgement of people who think they know what's best? Or, will I dive into the slipstream of dreams and visions where the notes played and the words spoken are not judged on the standards of "we've never done it that way before"? Will I fly on thermals of guessed at inklings and speak half-formed thoughts into places where the music and words build the halls of hope and grace? Will I play stodgy sounds and utter tired platitudes that massage the dreaded status quo while muttering comfort to its murky morass? Or, will I plunge into the clear air of the unknown and soar on the wings of prophetic and melodic freedom?
Hmmm... I guess I'll let you know my choice (if you haven't guessed it) when I finally land sometime, somewhere, somehow, somewhen, and somewhy...
Randy
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